Facing our truths can be challenging. Accepting the truth can be even harder.
Sometimes in life we want the truth and sometimes we don’t. It’s kind of like when we ask our significant other right before we’re ready to go out for the night, “Does my butt look big in these jeans?” There’s that part of us that wants the absolute truth. Then there’s that other part of us that doesn’t! What we want is the answer we’re really hoping for – “Absolutely not, you look amazing!”
When the truth of a situation is spoken out loud, whether it’s our voice or someone else’s, in an instant feelings of shame and guilt can overtake us. It can feel like an overwhelming holy shit kind of moment! Have you ever been staring truth in the face and had one of these moments? I know I have. You’ve heard, “The truth will set you free?” In reality, facing our truths can be challenging. Accepting the truth can be even harder. So, the question becomes whether truth ever feels freeing? Yes, I believe it can and does, but it takes time to arrive there. First, we must be in the right state of mind emotionally and mentally to be able to receive the truth. By the way, this has nothing to do with butts!
Is there an area of your financial life that could use some improvement? You likely already know it and have admitted it to yourself on some level. Perhaps though you may not have fully embraced the entire reality of your financial situation as of yet. Maybe it hurts too much to look at it right now at any other place than the surface level.
First, Kudos.
First, kudos to you for practicing any level of money awareness. Unfortunately, this is where most people stop. Why? Because it’s not easy to look at what we know we’re not doing so well at, or decisions we know we should be making but aren’t. So we turn tail and go back to paying attention to everything we think and feel is going well in our life, or what we know we’re good at. We focus on everything that’s within our control so we don’t have to feel so uncomfortable. Then we forget about what actually needs our attention for a moment until some other day when something reminds us of our financial truth, and we repeat the same cycle all over again.
There is a way you can embrace your financial truth without feeling like it hurts so much.
The way you do this is to think small steps. Thinking too much about everything that might be involved in changing your financial situation can cause you to feel paralyzed and more stressed.
Instead focus on these 2 small action steps to improve your financial future and you’ll get there one step at a time!
1. Every week spend one hour on improving your financial life. Get rid of any distractions–no spouse (unless you and your spouse have decided to do this exercise together), children, pets, housework-–anything that takes you away from that quiet space that allows for intuition to rise up and speak to you. Now, look in your financial mirror. Don’t look away. Spend a couple minutes just sitting. Ask yourself what changes you need to make for a better financial life. What’s coming up? Really listen. Do you need to rein in on your spending? Stop giving away money? Get a clear picture of what you’re spending every week?
Remember, shame and guilt for any mistakes you’ve made are disempowering emotions, so don’t allow yourself to go there. This exercise is for you to see your financial truth, not to judge it.
2. Were there several aspects of your financial life that came up that need improvement? Write down all your financial truths. Then choose only one from the list. Say your truth is that your spending is out of control or merely that you could pull back on some of your expenditures so you can put more toward savings. Write that truth down on a new sheet of paper.
Below your truth, write down your action step. What small change can you make that will allow you to create a new financial truth? Put this change into action every day. Next week, add another financial truth and action step to your list that you want to work on. Rinse and repeat!
Facing our financial truth doesn’t have to hurt. The key is letting go of shame and guilt that can accompany looking at your truth and taking small action steps that feel doable. Progress will help you build momentum toward a brighter financial future. You can do this!
And the truth is, if your butt really does look a little big in those jeans, know that you’re still amazing!
